Dreams of Motherhood never include vomit but they should...

So, our adventure for today began very early this morning. Like about 12:15am. Sugie had been crying and fussing at bedtime so I had pulled her into bed with me, which is pretty rare, especially in a full size bed I am sharing with my husband who is built like a Viking King. Anyway, as soon as she snuggled into the crook of my arm my face leaned in close to her forehead she drifted off. I was thankful as yesterday had been a pretty long and tiring day for me. This was about 10:30. At 12:15 I bolt awake to the sound of crying following by a burp and the sound of gagging. Even in my mid-slumber grogginess my instincts knew what this was. After all, after four kids, the sound of a sick baby is quite familiar. As I quickly rise to frantically look for a "catcher" that wouldn't be too major a loss I feel the nose burning liquid hit the chest of my shirt and run down my arm as it pours down her chest. Her little body heaves again as I begin scanning the dark unfamiliar room for ANY kind of catch that doesn't involve sacrificing the last shred of human dignity and skin I have...there is NOTHING. DH is happily snoozing beside me blissfully unaware of the impending disaster. I have no choice I say "Daddy! Get me a towel! Hurry!" as I yank off my shirt to save the cheap polyester hotel bedspread not because I care but because it is 8 degrees outside and I do not want to sleep under a vomit blanket. DH, the hero that he is, scrambles in a haze of sleep stumbling like a man who has had one too many Jager-bombs, to the bathroom to retrieve the much desired item. He tosses it from the door like a last second three pointer at an NBA finals game. I am as relieved as if I had been betting on the game and that shot just won me a large jackpot. She finally stops her exorcism like spewing of the foul liquid and drifts off to sleep. I think it is over and thank the Lord as I drift off smelly and holding a towel "catcher" at the ready under her chin just in case. Just as I begin to float into dreamland I am again jolted awake by the sound of gagging as a fountain of vomit explodes into the air coming down on my "catcher" the side of the baby's neck and down my armpit onto the bed. I flip her on her side to avoid joking only to spew a fresh pool of vomit onto my bed...where I need to sleep. Remember, we are in a full size bed, with a King Sized man, there is no "wiggle room". DH clambors for a fresh towel just as the baby launches a stream OVER the hand towel "catcher" onto the aforementioned polyester bedspread I sacrificed my top to save. So 6 towels, 4.5 hours, 1 shirt, 3 pairs of jammies, and lots of sanity and dignity later this mama finally gets to sleep on a towel over a mattress covered in vomit, with a baby nestled into her neck that smells like puke, next to a King sized man who is snoring like a chain saw, under a bedspread that is soaking wet from puke, in a poorly insulated hotel room, in Pennsylvania where it is 8 degrees with blowing snow outside. Yet somehow I slept better in the three hours I got to sleep than I have in days...oh yes...House Ninja...